Along with this consider who your friends are and who you hang out with and where and what they are into. In about half the sexual assaults out there the victim knows the perpetrator. Its even higher for just physical abuse and the incidence for that is quite high among females. So be and stay aware of your surroundings, and the people around you and how they behave and avoid them and those situations that might lend themselves to bad things happening concerning you in relation to them. Also consider what type of people you will be dating and keeping personal company with. A lot of young women make bad choices to begin with in that department and don't realize until older that they have been dating and becoming involved with the wrong type of people to begin with. Set your standards high enough to prevent that and also at the proper time let those know you won't have or put up with any of it from the beginning and if things go down that road then dump them.
Along with all this consider how you yourself act, dress, behave and carry yourself and the messages those things convey to others. I am not saying you have to dress and act like an old maid here but consider those things in relation to where you are going and what you are doing and those around you. Even then there are those out there that prey on others or do stupid things at times especially where drugs and alcohol are involved so that is where you being aware and being smart and proactive about things can help prevent you from being a victim again sometimes.
Lastly, don't be afraid to report it and let them get away with it and victimize others. Your silence allows them to do that and when you stand up to them and report it then realize you are standing up for others as well and maybe preventing others from being preyed upon or victimized along with standing up for yourself.
Congrats for taking this step. Now there is nothing silly about wanting to learn to defend yourself.
You are right that society does see us females as weak and this is what makes young girls grow up learning they are weak hence inferior. This is so far from the truth its not funny. A female can be every bit as good as a man when it comes to defending herself. Of course most of the time we are disadvantaged by muscle and power but this is only one element. We learn to be able to combat that through other skills and techniques.
My sister is about the identical size of you. She is 5'0 and 100 lbs and she is fearless. She has taken down men 6'4 and upwards. she is a very well trained and capable martial artist and i feel sorry for any many who tries to get it over her. So size means very little.
I suggest you start by finding a self defense course so that you can learn some basic skills to help you learn to defend yourself and then when that course is finished, find the best martial arts instructor or mma academy in your area and begin training with him/her. It does not matter about the style, it matters that you find the best instructor available. This does not mean it has to be the largest school, it means you need to find a school that has the best instruction. visit and do free lessons and watch how good the senior students are. This is an indication of how good the instructor is. If the instructor feels like they are a used car sales man and they are trying to sell their academy and style then go to another place as they are probably fakes lol. Dont rush in and sign any contracts, research and ask questions, even ask instructors at other styles if they have heard of the places that you are thinking about. Legitimate instructors will recognize the skills of other instructors, they wont just try and sell you that they are the best.
Train hard, have fun and be patient and you will learn
I'll sort out you mental strength as I think the guys have the physical side covered...
Okay, this is some advice I've been given to deter rapists,kidnappers and so on:
-If you walk like a victim then you will be one. For example say there's a guy (let's call him Jim) in the streets of Liverpool and he's looking for someone to rob,he's seen two girls walk past. One of them (let's call her lily) struts confidently past as if she owns the place,she holds her head high and looks completely unafraid and comfortable with her surroundings. The other girl (let's call her Jane) looks down at the floor,covers her head with her hoody and keeps nervously checking her watch,phone and so on.
Jim will always pick Jane to rob out of the two. You know why? Because she walks and acts like a victim. Project a confident aura and people will look at you and think "she seems the type who can take care of themselves,wouldn't wanna mess with her" .
-When your out and about do not EVER check your pockets to see your car keys,money,phone are all where you put them. It's like holding up a big sign saying " I've got valuables on my person,and I'm obviously unaware that their location(s) have just been revealed. Please come mug me".
-Listen to your gut instincts. For example if you think you being followed don't start speed walking whilst checking over your shoulder. Just go into a restaurant or crowded public area,stay there till you know your safe. Alternatively just RUN. Gut instinct is there for a reason.
Hope this helped,keep up the training.
Question if you are learning martial arts through a respectable school and not a mcdojo.
If not, Continue your martial arts training.
See about crossfit. This will greatly boost you in fitness and confidence. It will increase your cardio, stamina, strength, and so much more.
Most of all it's a mindset. You can do all this and more, but if you lack confidence in yourself and your abilities, than you have already lost.
You can have all the knowledge in the world, but if you are not confident in that knowledge and lack the ability and heart to carry such knowledge out, than your knowledge is worthless.
I hope that helped. Wish you the best of luck.
Check out the Suzy Lamplugh Tust website. it has lots of free advise for female self protection.
Good job keep learning martial arts.
dont kid yourself ,if u think u can defend yourself against someone of the opposite
sex u are fooling yourself ,the genetics dont lie and never will unless u alter your dna
sequence (kinda like the hulk) women will always be sucsectible for a take down and
a ground and pound ,it is not worth the risk ,the best is avoid dark alleys and have a curfew
of 10 pm
I want to protect myself from kidnapping, rape, sexual abuse/ harassment or just anyone taking advantage of me because I am girl ...I have been abused few times as a child, I felt so weak. I never again want to feel like this. I have see so many cases of women being ill treated because they think or are weak. It just make depressed sometimes cos of the horrible world I live in.
Anyways, I want to become a really strong person. So if ever get into a similar situation, I can do something about it. I don't ever want to taken advantage of ever. However, I am 152 cms tall only and my weight hangs around 45ish kg. My built is small.
I take up martial arts for some years but I still am the same flimsy girl. What should I do?? I want to become strong in every way (mentally, physically...). Is it silly of me to think this way.
Please do not take question this the wrong way. I know not everyone in this world is bad and women aren't the only ones getting harassed, kidnapped...
Thanks for you advice.
Cheers,
Princess :)
